My favourite X'mas song!! 12 days of christmas!

MERRY XMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Grandma passed away on last Wednesday. It wasn't a heavy blow to us because we were told by doctor to be mentally prepared. The wake wasn't much of a sad occasion but rather a celebration of her life. My relatives seem to have been mentally prepared and there weren't much of the teary scenes. The young ones are obviously oblivious of what is happening, while the adults were busy arranging the wake according to the wishes of my grandma (she listed down all that she wanted before her death). I didn't cry, perhaps because I was not close to her, perhaps because there is really nothing to cry since she died of old age peacefully.

In my memory, she was always walking around in the house or praying to the god and saying prayers. She would always sleep when the tv was on and wake up the moment the tv was switched off. I ain't close to her, neither am I stranger to her. She's my only Hakka source who I can speak and hear Hakka with (with my little Hakka vocab). She's the only old folk who likes to drink 7 up everyday until when her liver stopped functioning 1 year ago.

Her death will change a few things in our lives. The 2-storey bungalow kampong house will be left as it is because it is getting unstable and grandma no longer lives there. CNY will never be the same because we no longer get to gather in the kampong. My paternal relatives will probably no longer be that close to each other, especially so for my generation when we only meet once or twice a year.

Each time when I come across a death, I will always wonder that perhaps it is already fated since birth. From the moment they were borned, do they know that they were fated to die on a certain day? Just like a primary schmate of mine who passed away 2 wks ago suddenly. When we were in primary sch, who would have expected him to pass away when he turned 24 years old? And if you know your life expectancy, will you lead your life differently?

Love yourself. Love your family. Love your friends. Don't let time and chance slip through.